_[TBF]_[Into The Sunset]_

So… thought I was gone did you?

Allow me first to clear the air on a few things:
1. I didn’t retire because Obama won… didn’t hurt, though.
2. I didn’t lose everything and am now forced to live in a van down by the river!
3. I’m not hung over from celebrating New Years, St. Patrick’s Day and Cinco De Mayo consecutively!
4. I didn’t run off with Marie to get married and live happily ever after….
5. I didn’t run off with Harlean either… although I am keeping my options open on that one (fingers crossed)
6. And finally no, I did not commit that murder and my attorneys have assured me that he was suicidal and if the shotgun don’t fit, they must acquit.


Truth be told I’m ready to move on to other things in my life. I still believe there’s so much to talk about but honestly… being a guy sitting in a chair writing about how he could fix the world doesn’t really fix anything. Essentially it’s just a refined form of bitching. And bitching doesn’t solve anything; it just makes you look like a whiny little bitch. Speaking from the heart is never a bad thing, in fact I whole heartily endorse it, but actions from the heart create more impact. Now I could easily sit here and write and write but I’d never feel satisfied. Sitting back and watching from a distance has its pluses and minuses. I could sit back and say this is wrong and this is right but these nesscesary voices and more importantly these nesscesary words eventually fall on deaf ears and end up lost among a sea of lost hopes and lost dreams….

Sometimes the best way to make an impact is to work on one problem at a time. I’ve done the best I can at this stage but for what I want to do next requires me to step up my game and truthfully I don’t view the factor as a useful tool as this stage of the game.

I’ve got some new projects to work on, some new ideas to expand on and some people to reconnect to. The spirit of the factor can never die mostly cause it’s spirit came not from the guy who wrote it but the people who read it and believed in the same and or similar dream of just trying to make our world make sense and make it better for everyone.

We Have Come To Terms.

Until… Some Time.

My Part to Combat the Flu....

[TBF]_01.22.2009_

So where do we begin?

The adage I was taught to look for in life went as followed:

* you grow up
* you meet someone
* Fall in love
* and live happily ever after

Sound familiar? Believe me when I say if it does, then I feel your pain.

The rules of dating are as simple as playing D & D, solving Quantum Physics and baking a pie all at once. That shit is hard, folks. I mean I'm not lying when I say if my choices were to go out and try dating or go to war... my ass would be in Iraq right now.. cause let's be honest, if I have to be in a fight, I'd rather be in a fight I could win.

Dating... What the fuck?

The Brian Factor: Dating

Now before I begin, just for clarification: I am not hating on women, okay, I am just trying to understand all the bullshit and the drama and essentially the hoops we put ourselves through just to meet someone... and don't act like I'm wrong. You know damn well I'm speaking the truth.

Now I've seen all kinds when it comes to dating: Young love, strange love, self, love... Okay maybe some more than others but now is not the time for semantics. There's all kinds of subtypes for dating that trying to pick a type of girl I want to meet in the first place is actually harder than filling out my taxes (let's see section 9 paragraph 15: Do you want a Blonde? If so what shade of blonde?).

Even then I still have to find out if a girl is even interested (and of course if she's even a she, I've seen the Crying Game) then you have to see if she is "officially single" and if she is then you have to see if she's not "Talking to someone" or "Hanging out with someone" or "Fucking someone", or as I call this wonderful labyrinth of socializing... MySpace.

"Talking with Someone" I get, everybody talks to someone everyday, we talk about work, life, sports, who's is bigger, etc. "Hanging out with someone" apparently is the new term for a fuck buddy, plain and simple, well.. anybody who's ever had a fuck buddy would agree it starts simple then falls apart faster than a guy's innocence in a Lifetime movie of the week.

"Fucking Someone"... Oh that's not even trying anymore!!!

Well at least it's not a "Paper Relationship", God knows I'd hate to be in one of those. Since you asked what it is, I will explain: A "Paper Relationship" is essentially two people who don't want to be alone soooo bad that will simply be with someone just because it's better than nothing. Now look I know what it's like to be single for realllllly looong tiiime and I can tell you there are times where I'd give my left.. everything if it meant I didn't have to be alone anymore, I mean you can only say "Table for 1" so many times before it starts just sounding sad that the restaurant knows before you have to say it. I have tons of friends and family but let's be honest here: there will always be that one itch that a friend or family member can't scratch... Well maybe in Kentucky.

I can't do one night stands because well let's face it: as much of an ass as I can be, I'm still too much of a nice guy plus it pretty much goes against everything I believe in and stand for.. so, yeah.

I got bored one night and drove for a while and ended up down south, I ran into an acquaintance and we ended up having this conversation which inspired this week's column and we both agreed on a lot of the key points I wrote but also we both believe in the idea of that one special person out there who's our destined partner and we both agreed that one day we will meet up and live happily ever after, and I believe that for eveyone, hell if you're lucky you already got that special someone now (lucky bastard) as for the rest of us still in waiting this is all I will say to the fates/ powers that be....

DUDE WHAT THE FUCK!! HOW ABOUT A ROAD SIGN! YOU MEAN TO TELL ME I CAN'T FIND OUT HOW FAR I AM FROM LOVE BUT YOU'LL GLADLY TELL ME I'M 396 MILES FROM L.A., FUCK THAT.

I'm serious and I know I'm not alone when I say that I want a sign that I'm on the right path, nothing biblical (no burning bush, flood, first born dying) just a subtle sign that basically says "Keep the faith, you're almost there". Cause believe me when I tell you folks, there's a lot that can keep a man going when everything in him wants to quit: anger, pain, a lot of meth... but nothing works any better than just one thing: Hope.

Give a man Hope, and he'll gladly ride to Hell and back, I know I will, wouldn't you?

We Have Come To Terms.

_[TBF]_01.15.2009_

So where do we begin?

It seems that in my time away, things have gotten a little worse for wear... Naturally I blame Marie for this but only because she always makes a great scapegoat in these situations.

So far the story seems to be the same: just a whole lot of characters repeating the same mistakes over and over again like a waltz with no end in sight. But on the plus side we finally learned to be united as one world... by taking it up the ass simultaneously as we let this shit happen. Congratulations we've officially become that girl with the low self esteem at the frat kegger who ends up on youporn... round of applause.

So let's recap:

* Countries are at war with everyone
* The Economy's so bad that everyone plays Monopoly just to brag that they own property
* People are complaining it's too hot
* People are complaining that it's too cold
* People are complaining that we're not green enough
* People are complaining that we're too green
* Gays moved two steps forward only to be pushed five steps back
* Oakland's tearing itself apart because 1/3 are mad about the BART cop being arrested, another 1/3 are mad because he wasn't arrested sooner and the rest are generally pissed because the Raiders are in another "Rebuilding year"
* The Religious fanatics are freaking out as we approach 2012 (The final year in the Mayan Calendar)
* While movie fanatics are freaking out because Roland Emmerich is releasing another disaster film called 2012

And... I think that's it... did I forget anything?

[Marie]: ABC cancelled Pushing daises and they're replacing Dr. Who again...

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

Where the hell was I???

[Marie]: You had a psychotic break, ran off for six months and came back looking like the fourth member of ZZ Top, plus you really need a shower...

So wait, what the hell was everyone doing while I was gone?

[Marie]: We were watching the new judge on American Idol.

(shudder) Well... Looks like I have some work to do.

This is going to be a looooong year.

_Soundboard_[01.06.2009]_

"All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances;
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages.

At first the infant,
Mewling and puking in the nurse's arms;

And then the whining schoolboy, with his satchel
and shining morning face, creeping like snail
Unwillingly to school.

And then the lover,
Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad
Made to his mistress' eyebrow.

Then a soldier,
Full of strange oaths, and bearded like the pard,
Jealous in honor, sudden and quick in quarrel,
Seeking the bubble reputation
Even in the cannon's mouth.

And then the justice,
In fair round belly with good capon lin'd,
With eyes severe and beard of formal cut,
Full of wise saws and modern instances;
And so he plays his part.

The sixth age shifts
Into the lean and slipper'd pantaloon,
With spectacles on nose and pouch on side;
His youthful hose, well sav'd, a world too wide
For his shrunk shank; and his big manly voice,
Turning again toward childish treble, pipes
And whistles in his sound.

Last scene of all,
that ends this strange eventful history,
is second childishness and mere oblivion;
sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything."

[Light of the Angel]_11.21.2008_

Angel has returned to TBF... and this Angel means Business!
-B

Why is it that men can never appreciate when he has a
beautiful, good, nice, faithful woman by his side? Why do
men still have the need to look at the trashy looking slut
in the dance floor?

Ladies if we put in as much effort into our careers as we
do with our men, imagine that we would be millionaires! I
know I am not the only one that has felt the need to
overcompensate with their men because of our own
insecurities…right?

Sometimes I feel I have to give too much just to keep
someone happy, and I want the same in return but I end up
settling for less than what I put into a relationship
because I don’t make myself be respected. I often feel
that if I give a lot I will be liked or loved a lot. If you
are too nice to people they will come to take you for
granted or not appreciate it and step all over you.
Sometimes you must learn to say “NO!” or in some cases
“Hell No!” Even if that means coming across like a bitch
every now and then. Sh*t! if that means getting some
respect and men treating you like you deserve to be treated,
then so be it!

I think its time we ladies take over the game and I hate to
say it, but, ok, here it goes…hear me out though, we need
to act a bit more like…Men! Yeah I said it, Men!

See men don’t sit around waiting by the phone wondering
if we are going to call or what we are doing. They go out
and have fun while we females are waiting around for them.
Men don’t call you to say they miss you or ‘baby I love
you’ or no mushy shit like that, if they call you its
right to the point, and hang up. Men don’t think there is
nothing wrong with having a girl and talking to million
others at the same time. Men don’t think there is nothing
wrong with being out with your girl and flirting with other
women while she is there with you. (Shame on you men!) LOL!

So why are we females more susceptible to this type of
humiliation? Because we think too much and we care too much
and we give too much, and we respect too much, and we love
too much, bottom line; we aren’t enough like men! We wear
our feelings in our face, and we need to stop that and enjoy
life.

“Life is too short to deal with all this MEN DRAMA!”

Ladies we need to put on our sexy heals, and our
“freak’em” dress on, and go out with our girls and
have a good time, not call our men, leave them thinking for
once and just enjoy ourselves…cuz believe me when I say
this, he ain’t going to be home alone missing you, he will
probably be out with that other chick, while you are
thinking he is so into you and loves you only and blah,
blah, blah!

Lets wake up girls and treat ourselves with respect, love
ourselves, show our men what we are WORTH, and if they are a
good man and worth holding on to, they will value you and
treat you like a trophy worth winning. If they don’t then
Fuck him, and move on…There is plenty of more men in the
sea to be stuck on a loser!

Angelkissess

Angelkissess quote “Believe Me, I am someone you will
regret losing…I promise!”

Disclosures:

By the way I am talking about the good woman that treat
their man right (and get treated like dirt), by far am I
saying all woman are this way, hell no some are just
straight up sluts! (And by the same token, not all men are
this way either, but the ones I have come across are, or
some of my girls)

[The Shadow Chronicles]_11.21.2008_

Chapter 4: Voodoo Child (Slight Return)

First: "Houses Of The Holy".... LED ZEPPLIN!!!

Secondly: Sorry for the extended absence but I was in the back taking a nap... Hope I didn't miss anything important.

The greatest stories never told are the stories that currently have no ending, they are the stories that are truly unhindered (no offense Marie). They are the stories that are filled with Hope, Pain, Love and Sorrow. The greatest stories focus on the Hero's pursuits and it's aftermath or endgame as a result which culminated from the time and effort of the journey.

These stories are of course the stories of you and I.

Have you ever taken the time to go back and read your story? To see where the Hero went left when they should've gone right? To see where the Hero started and where they are now? Finally have you gone back to see who the Hero was in the beginning and who the Hero has become today? If the words I've written find resonance within you, then you can understand why I've been away for so long.

I shouldn't be gone much longer... I'm just making some changes to my story. Whether it leads to a happy ending or not is still unknown, but at least I like the Hero a little more than I used to... And that's still something to me.

Until Next Time,
-B